I'm a bit thick thread...

[Furious Wolfie 180]

Only till last year I thought 'Timber' was pronounced 'Timberg'

[AKA Topcat]

I thought this was a darts site!

[J Y Kelly]

Once playing Trivial Pursuit my missus' sister was asked "Which two countries can you see from the top of Mt Killimanjaro.

Her Answer was "I don't know...India and France?"


She also thought the program ER was called that because it's the noise ambulances make.

True Story.

[Captain Janks]

India and France Fucking hell.

[Dutch]

I still get confused with my left & right.

[mattp]

A relative of mine - female of course - once advertised that she had some "Chester drawers" for sale.
And the same relative heard a rumour that Midge Ure was "biosexual"

[Furious Wolfie 180]

Once playing Trivial Pursuit my missus' sister was asked "Which two countries can you see from the top of Mt Killimanjaro.

Her Answer was "I don't know...India and France?"


She also thought the program ER was called that because it's the noise ambulances make.

True Story.

tremendous

[Ken]

I once thought I saw a loaf of bread with my name on it. Turns out it was thick cut.

[Falconhoof]

I occasionally piss through my arse and shit through my dick, ha ha, I forget which one is supposed to do what, travellers.

[OnTheWire]

I occasionally piss through my arse and shit through my dick, ha ha, I forget which one is supposed to do what, travellers.

Falconhoof paraphrasing "How's your Mother" by Derek and Clive, there.
"Now he shits through his prick"

[OnTheWire]

I only realised about four years ago that the play on words in the name of The Beatles was that it contained the word "Beat".

Until then I thought they'd just changed the spelling for the hell of it, like "Kwik Save"

[Sir Geoff]

A few of us were standing at the tea shack on the beach one morning when someone said to one of the more dim-witted guys amongst us (not me!) "Who painted the self-portrait of Van Gogh?"

To which he spectacularly replied "How should I know, I don't know fuck all about art..."

I think a little bit of wee came out!

[Ken]

A few of us were standing at the tea shack on the beach one morning when someone said to one of the more dim-witted guys amongst us (not me!) "Who painted the self-portrait of Van Gogh?"

To which he spectacularly replied "How should I know, I don't know fuck all about art..."

I think a little bit of wee came out!

is it james wade?

[Sir Geoff]

No, he was some thick cunt trying to fit in

[macca]

Tyke getting shit done, there

[Joe Bananas]

I used to think Margaret Thatcher and Maggie Thatcher where two different people. I was only about six but there were probably adults who thought the same.

[Reddersisbent]

I'm really clever to be honest but a low point of my life was registering for a darts forum full of tramps, thickos and northerners.

[Dutch]

full of tramps, thickos and northerners.

No thickos around ear

[Pep]

Phoned up my bank earlier today as their website is utter shite, got through to a call centre in Sheffield and asked whether they had a certain branch in the Republic of Ireland.

Her reply ''Is that Northern or Southern Ireland''.

I hung up the phone at this point.

[J Y Kelly]

Phoned up my bank earlier today as their website is utter shite, got through to a call centre in Sheffield and asked whether they had a certain branch in the Republic of Ireland.

Her reply ''Is that Northern or Southern Ireland''.

I hung up the phone at this point.

That's one thing to be said for the troubles... Nasty affair, but improved the English lay-persons knowledge of the geography, politics and religion of the place.

[Joe Bananas]

You often see people say Donegal is in Southern Ireland.

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